Toilet training is an important stage in your child's social development.
It is necessary to teach your child bowel and bladder control.
Your child is toilet trained when she can walk to the potty, undress, go
to the bathroom, and pull up her pants without any reminders.
When is my child ready?
There is no set age to begin training. Each child is ready at a different
time. Between 18 months and 24 months, your child might start to show signs
that she is ready. Children are sometimes not ready until 30 months or older.
Signs include:
Your child stays dry at least 2 hours at a time during the day.
She stays dry during naps.
Bowel movements have become regular and predictable.
Your child can tell when she has to urinate or have a bowel movement.
She jumps up and down, holds herself, or tells you she has to go to the
bathroom.
She can follow simple instructions.
She can walk to and from the bathroom.
She can help undress herself.
She seems uncomfortable in wet or soiled diapers and wants to be changed.
She asks to use the toilet or wants to wear grown-up underwear.
Your child must also be emotionally ready. If she resists being trained,
do not force her. She will become ready with time. The following situations
can make training more difficult:
Your family has just moved or is planning to move in the near future.
The family is expecting a new baby or has a new baby.
The family has experienced some other major change, such as a death,
divorce, or illness.
Do not force your child to train before she is ready. This can make your
child feel bad and training may take longer. It can also lead to long-term
problems with bowel movements.
How do I toilet train my child? Decide what words to use. Introduce your child to the potty-chair. Help
her notice signs that she has to go to the bathroom. Take practice trips to
the potty. Praise your child for each small success.
Decide what words to use
Teach your child how to talk about going to the bathroom.
Choose words that she can say and words that family and friends will
be willing to use.
Avoid words that make going to bathroom seem naughty, such as "stinky"
or "dirty."
Use simple words such as "potty," "wet," and "dry."
Introduce your child to the potty-chair
If your child is ready, get a potty-chair (a child-size toilet).
Potty-chairs are easier for children to use. It's best if their feet
can touch the floor.
Make this a special event for her. Let her help you pick it out or put
her name on it.
Put it in the room your child usually plays in.
Let her sit on the potty-chair in her clothes while she is playing,
watching TV, or eating snacks. This helps her get used to it and have
good feelings about it.
Do this for at least one week before moving the chair to the bathroom.
Do not move it until it is clear that your child likes the chair and
considers it her own.
Never force your child on the potty-chair or strap her in.
Help her notice signs that she has to go to the bathroom
Encourage your child to tell you when she has to go to the bathroom.
Praise her even if she tells you after she has urinated or had a bowel
movement. Encourage her to tell you earlier next time.
Watch your child for signs that she has to go to the bathroom. Her face
may turn red or she may grunt or stop playing. Ask her, "Do you have to
go potty?"
Praise her when she tells you she needs to be changed or if she tells
you she has to go to the bathroom.
Take practice trips to the bathroom
Do not start trying to train until your child has gotten used to her
potty-chair and has good feelings about it.
Move the potty-chair to the bathroom. If possible, place potty-chairs
in all the bathrooms your child might use.
Take regular trips to the bathroom with her (every 1-1/2 to 2 hours).
Take her to the potty after she wakes up in the morning, after meals,
and before naps.
Encourage your child to sit on the chair with her pants and underwear
down. Do not force her.
Keep her on the potty for only a few minutes at a time. If she resists,
she may not be ready to train. Be patient and wait for a better time.
If your child is content, let her sit on the potty for up to five minutes.
If nothing is happening, move on to a new activity.
Encourage your child to use the potty when you notice signs that she
has to go to the bathroom.
Some children start by sitting on the potty and urinating or having
the bowel movement in their diaper.
These practice runs are usually not needed after 1 or 2 months.
Give your child praise for each small success. Use small rewards, such as kind
words, smiles, hugs, stickers, or favorite snacks. Avoid punishment. This can
make your child feel bad and may make training last longer.
How long should it take?
Each child is different.
Children often learn bowel control first. Noticing signs that they need
to urinate often takes longer, even months more.
Boys often learn to urinate sitting down first, and later change to standing.
Most children get bowel control and daytime urination control around 3-4
years old.
Staying dry during the night often takes months or years longer. Bedwetting
is a common childhood condition.
Most girls and 75% of boys can stay dry through the night after age 5.
Your child will probably tell you when she is ready to use the big toilet.
Give her a stepping stool to use if needed. Help her practice.
What if it's not working?
Do not force your child to train before she is ready.
Expect accidents (wetting or soiling her pants).
Do not show disappointment if your child has an accident.
Do not punish your child if she has accidents or if she resists training.
This can make her feel bad and training may take longer.
Forcing your child to toilet train can lead to long-term problems with bowel
movements.
Pressuring your child to use the potty might make her resist training even
more.
Be patient and wait for a better time.
If training is especially difficult, it is most likely a sign that your
child is not ready yet.
What are some helpful tips?
Read children's books to your child about toilet training.
Stay with your child while she sits on the potty-chair. Help her relax.
Read to her and talk with her.
It is sometimes helpful if children watch you use the toilet. Your child
will want to imitate you. If possible, a female should show a girl and a male
should show a boy. Your child can learn from a parent, sister, brother, relative,
or trusted family friend.
To help your child understand what the potty-chair is for, let her watch
you transfer stool from her diaper into the potty-chair.
Children are often curious about their feces. They may want to touch it.
Say simply, "This is not something to play with."
Help your child get used to the toilet. Let her practice flushing the toilet
and watching toilet paper or feces disappear.
Girls should be taught to wipe from front to back to avoid spreading germs
toward the vagina.
Teach your child how to wash her hands. Wash hands after each time she uses
the restroom.
When can she wear training pants?
Once your child starts to stay dry, encourage her to wear training pants.
A good sign she is ready is if she passes at least half of her urine or
bowel movements in the potty.
If she comes to you to take her diaper off when she needs to go to the bathroom,
she is probably ready for training pants.
Make it a proud step for your child. It is a sign that she is growing up!
Take her with you to buy the training pants.
Buy loose-fitting pants that are easy for her to pull up and down on her
own. Help her practice.
Be prepared for accidents. It can take months for training to be complete.
Continue to use diapers for naps and nighttime as needed.
Continue to praise her for using the potty.
When should I call the doctor?
Call your doctor for advice about toilet training.
Call your doctor if you have concerns about your child and toilet training.
Call the doctor if your child resists toilet training and shows signs of
constipation.
Call the doctor if your child is 5 years old and is not daytime trained.
Quick Answers
Toilet training is an important stage in your child's social development.
Each child is ready for toilet training at a different time. It is usually
between 18 months and 24 months but could take longer.
Decide what words to use. Introduce your child to the potty-chair. Help
her notice signs that she has to go to the bathroom. Take practice trips to
the potty. Praise your child for each small success.
Every child learns at a different pace. Most children have daytime control
around 5 years of age. Many children wet the bed for months or years longer.
Do not force your child to train before she is ready or punish her for accidents.
Stay with your child while she sits on the potty-chair. Show her how a parent
or sibling uses the toilet, too.
Once your child starts to use the potty, encourage her to wear training
pants.
Call your doctor if you have concerns about your child and toilet training.
References
American Academy of Family Physicians. Toilet Training Your Child. FamilyDoctor.
1991-2000 (cited 2002 March 7). URL: http://www.familydoctor.org/handouts/179.html
American Academy of Pediatrics. Toilet Training: Guidelines for Parents.
1998 (cited 2002 March 7). URL: http://www.medem.com/search/article_display.cfm?path=n:&mstr=/ZZZR6LONH4C.html&soc=AAP&srch_typ=NAV_SERCH
Schmitt, BD. Toilet Training Basics. Virtual Children's Hospital: Iowa Health
Book. 2001 May 14 (cited 2002 March 7).
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